This week, as I drove through town, I passed a church that said, “Only Jesus Saves.” Then, right next door, a bank, with no sign. “Really?” I thought. What a missed opportunity.

Last Friday, the husband and I went out to dinner at the PA House. It’s an amazing little restaurant in Hellertown that feels right out of LA or NY. Either way, it’s swanky, and I love it so much. My husband got the lobster risotto, I got the Cobb salad, and we shared “the warm cookie.”

Saturday we had a follow-up Christmas with my sister-in-law and her kids, down from Connecticut. There were hot dogs and mac-n-cheese to eat, legos to build, and football on tv.

Sunday I went to the Yoga Loft even though I promised I’d go to church, alternating each week with yoga to make it fair, but then Yoga drew me like a self-care magnet that I couldn’t resist. And I don’t feel bad. It was a packed class which makes me so happy for Lisa. She’s so good and everyone should know it. But I never noticed yoga being resolution-effected. And then we celebrated the husband’s birthday. He asked for fancy macaroni and cheese, like he does every year. I always serve it as the main dish with a salad, but this year I added meatloaf and it was a big hit. I had a lot of help from the kids and it was probably the most fun I’ve had cooking for and hosting a party. Even though I failed on the cake frosting again. If you want the M&C recipe, it’s from the famous Vegetarian Epicure cookbook which you can get on Amazon. Or ask me and I’ll share it. I also have the world’s best chocolate cake recipe.

Monday it snowed. They cancelled school even though we didn’t get very much snow at all. And then the kids had “late arrival” all week due to standardize testing. It sort of threw us back into the Christmas break mentality so it’s been a very slow return to normalcy. I booked my trip to St. Louis in April. I’ve never been! Sort of want to do the Arch.

I finished Remarkable Bright Creatures and started James.

Tuesday I had my first class with Abigail Rasminsky and it was awesome. If you don’t know her, she’s an amazing writer and teacher. She’s a regular contributor to Cupojo.com as well as many other publications. This is the second writer’s workshop I’ve attended and it’s the most fun. You sign up for eight weeks of one hour zoom sessions with Abigail and a bunch of badass women writers where you get a writing prompt, a ‘space’ to write, plus tons of community, camaraderie, and hilarity.

The week gets better. Wednesday I went to see the musical Dear Evan Hansen at the State Theater in Easton. My friend Meaghan, who I’ve made a secret pact with to get out and do fun things with this winter had an extra ticket to the show. OH MY GAWD. The best Broadway musical, I think, of my life.

And then, AND THEN, Thursday, I had my Writers’ Circle at the Frenchtown Bookshop. This is where area writers meet and read their in-progress work and get feedback. It’s fun, funny, terrifying, helpful, and uplifting. I’m learning so much, and getting to know very interesting people.

And now it’s Friday. The husband is going to his Whisky tasting night so no date night. Maybe tomorrow.

Hey what’s up?

Okay, here we are. It’s a new year. But I’m not going to talk about newness, just what I’ve been up to.

This past week:

This past Friday I went to visit my family in DC. (Actually, we got down there Thursday and saw my cousins, spending time in Georgetown having ramen at Oki and the coffee at Compass while our kids did an escape room.) It was quiet at my dad’s. Not a lot going on. We went to lunch, a very standard type place in Bethesda called Matchbox. Pizza is kind of their thing but DC pizza has a really hard time competing with the pizza where we live—NY and Philly-adjacent pizza. DC pizza can’t feel good about itself so I try not to bring it up. I ordered fish and chips. My dad got a breaded chicken sandwich with egg salad on top which I didn’t know was a thing. My son got a burger with an egg on it… (what’s with all the eggs on top of meats?) …which he didn’t know if he wanted or would like but he really did. My daughter and husband each got pizzas. There was a quick trip to Target, a drive by my old ballet studio which is now a dispensary, (boo!) and then some chillin’ at my dad’s, watching tv shows like the new Hawaii 5-0 and the new Magnum PI. My dad loves a crime drama, so that’s probably where I get it. We lounged around until my brother got off work and we all went to sushi. Now the sushi in DC “slaps” as the teens say, or did up until a couple days ago. At least the sushi at the place we go in Tenleytown, named Yosaku, is really good. The kids had been off since the previous Friday and even with all the time available, it was a real effort to get everyone together and squeeze in a visit to my family. I’m so glad we did.

We drove home Saturday in rain and dense fog, and then spent the evening recovering.

Sunday I went to my favorite yoga class, saw my favorite yoga teacher, Lisa who had been gone for a few weeks helping on her family’s Christmas tree farm. It was so good to be back. I had missed a bunch of Sundays because I decided Christmas would be more Christmassy and I’d feel more grounded if I went to all four weeks of Advent and i was right, but I do wish church wasn’t the same day as my favorite yoga class.

At some point this week i started every conversation with a confirmation of what day of the week it was so that I would know.

Monday we were STILL on vacation and it involved a lot of doing nothing in particular. Monday night I hung out with some girlfriends and we got pizza (PIZZA!) at the Colonial in Easton PA. Amazing. Also when we split the bill it was $11 per person. With tip. When does that happen?

It’s starting to look like I’m writing a food review blog. And I would be happy to.

Tuesday/New Year’s Wve was super quiet and involved ordering Chinese food and watching the last episode of Ted Lasso season 3. I spent time finishing up a website job for my friend and artist Glenn Harren.

Wednesday was New Year’s Day and we went to my in-laws to eat pork and sauerkraut. It’s not my favorite but it’s good luck. also my mother-in-law’s cheese cake is the absolute best in the whole world and I can get the recipe for you if you want it. She put raspberry sauce (?) on top and for the next two hours I tried to get the raspberry seeds out of the raspberry-seed-shaped fissures in my molars. I finally did with a sewing needle.

Thursday we all went back to our jobs and it was uneventful. my husband had a massage. I submitted a short story to www.thesunmagazine.org. I set a goal to publish the collection of stories i recently finished and someone suggested getting them published in an online magazine. I feel really good about sending something off. I also made some design updates to my website and committed to weekly posts.

And today in Friday again. My daughter had her last dermatology appointment after doing Accutane for most of the year. (last year) and i’m really going to miss her doctor. She is the best. Tonight, the husband and I are going on a date.

I’ve been wanting to break down all my favorite shows from this year. I really watched a lot of “tv” in 2020, but I’m probably not alone in that. It’s funny how you find a show you like and binge it, or sometimes try to make it last and then feel so lost when it’s over. There are some shows I wish I could go back in time and watch again for the first time, shows that stay with you, that you remember so vividly. I know that shows and movies are so subjective, you like what you like. I’ve suggested shows to friends and they didn’t like them and vice versa. Then there’s that terrible purgatory of the “show hole”  where you’ve finished a series you loved and cannot find anything as good for a while. If you’re in that place, maybe this list will help. I’ve ranked my top 10 favorite shows and movies from both Prime and Netflix.

AMAZON PRIME

1. The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel – Please watch this show! It is so delicious. There is a fair amount of cursing, so, beware, but I loved Mrs. Maisel, a wealthy New York divorcee turned stand up comedienne. It is full of 1950s fashion, backwards thinking and irreverent revolt against every institution. Love, love, love.
2. Endeavor – Most favoritest show probably ever. It is British, a crime drama, set in the Sixties and stars super swoon-worthy Shaun Evans. I watched to the end of season six this year. Then I fell into a deep Endeavor-deprivation down spiral. I was so sad to leave my ‘friends,’ and would miss all the lingo I had come to know, like, “Mind how you go…”
3. Homeland – Tenth and final season. This show is quite violent and dark and probably not for everyone. I had to watch it because my number one weakness is Spy Drama. I love spies, I especially love girl spies. And Carrie is such a beautiful, lovable f-up. It’s got middle east multi-layer political crisis and Russians and bureaucracy and Saul. Sometimes it was too much for me and sometimes it gave me so much anxiety because I know a lot of that stuff was going on in real life, but I stuck it out and I loved how it all went to hell in the end and then wrapped up happily like a Disney movie.
4. The Durrells in Corfu – There is no show like this! It’s SO good. Set in the 1930s England, a widowed mother of four decides to move to Greece. It is such a beautiful setting and has great characters and acting. I could not get enough of this show.
5. Hanna – So, ass-kicking girl spies hiding in European forests. Super secret intrigue and no one can be trusted. Hanna always out smarts everyone and manages to escape.
6. Death in Paradise – best sappy-sweet, super formulaic British crime drama set in a fictional Caribbean island. You’ll fall in love with the head detective and after a couple seasons he’ll be off the show. A ton of seasons, a ton of episodes. There’s always a murder, exactly 4 suspects and they all have an alibi. All the feel-good reggae and dancehall hits. Beautiful island scenes.
7. Homecoming – Sort of like Hanna, sinister government project with human test subjects, dark suspense and mystery. Will the protagonists figure it out, escape and bring down the bad guys?
8. Counterpart – Fell in love with the Nationwide insurance guy. Nerdy sci-fi at its best. It’s the future? There are two parallel universes and everyone exists in both.
9. Upload – Also sci-fi and kind of a little bit Black Mirror. Life the afterlife virtually. Weird and kind of light-hearted fun. Main female role is so cute, so likable.
10. Ladies in Black – I’ll throw this one in. I’ve never heard anyone else mention this little gem. It’s about a group of women who work in a department store, in Australia, in the 50s. Really lovely and original.

Honorable mentions: Jack Ryan, Fleabag, Big Little Lies

NETFLIX

1. The Queen’s Gambit – Can’t stop thinking about this. It’s fairly dark, but… the clothes, the sets, THE CHESS. Anya Taylor-Joy is mesmerizing as the lead. It was very bingeable. So original. Kinda think I’m going to have to watch it all over again.
2. The Crown  season 3 and season 4 – I’ve been loving the Crown all along. It took me a while to get over the fact that they switched out the whole cast after season 2 (and will again for season 5). Some episodes are more entertaining than others. Some are so sad. But the characters just keep growing on you. Please watch it! Then tell me who your favorite family member is.
3. Rita  season 5 – No one I know has watched Rita, or upon my recommendation as far as I know. It’s in Danish and subtitled but that should not deter you. It is amazing. I highly recommend it. Especially if you are a school teacher. But also if you are a parent or a woman or a human of any kind.
4. I’m Sorry – this is a show you watch and do not tell anyone you do. It’s so wrong. So funny. But so wrong. I loved it too much.
5. Queer Eye season 5 – this show gets better every episode, every season. I get that it may not be your “cup of tea” but I LOVE a makeover and it’s like makeover to the 5th power. And Jonathan.
6. Ozark  season 3 – This drama pulls you in and you find yourself hooked and then so disturbed. It’s beyond dark. I really can’t do this kind of show anymore but dammit, Jason Bateman, you make dark so adorable. Such a good cast and so twisty turny and original.
7. Sex Education – It took a few episodes but this became a favorite. Basic premise: high school boy and son of a sex therapist (Jillian Anderson) sells sex therapy to his classmates. It’s an honest and diverse look at sex and growing up. (Not for kids!)
8. Black AF – I never watched Blackish, but fell into watching this and loved it. So worth it.
9. The Goop Lab – SO GOOPY. If you’ve heard anything about Gwyneth Paltrow (GP) and her company Goop, you won’t be surprised by the cooky therapies they try on this show. I liked it. Let me know if I’m crazy.
10. Last Tango in Halifax – Two English senior citizens meet after 60 years and fall in love. Their families don’t. I’m not sure why I’m putting this last, it was very well done. It’s got some very downer, depressing, heavy bits… but I really got into it.

Honorable mentions: Derry Girls, Workin’ Moms, The Good Girls, Atypical, Down to Earth, The Duchess, The Good Place

It’s been awhile. I haven’t been blogging. I haven’t been socializing. I haven’t been a part of the world. So I thought I’d check in with you all. After much thought and reflection, I’ve come up with a vision for this platform, this blog. And that is this: just post stuff. Sometimes a crappy effort is better than no effort at all. Creativity is a tricky thing. And I can talk myself out of creating because I think too much about my audience’s reaction. But, really, who cares? Sometimes the cure for feeling stuck is to just do the next thing, no matter what anyone thinks about it.

Let’s pretend that I posted something new every week. That would take us back to April 3rd. That was my friend Annie’s birthday. Some of her friends and I decided to go over to her house and sing happy birthday to her in her driveway. That turned into dressing up and singing and dancing to ABBA. And then that morning it was rainy and I thought we decided to wait until the afternoon when it let up. I stepped out of the shower and Peggy called and said where are you?! I said I’m not dressed and aren’t we doing it later? to which she said, and I quote, “Just put on your wig and get over here!” And I did. We danced in the rain to Waterloo and Mamma Mia and Annie videoed it and even though we said do NOT post that, she put it on YouTube.

A few days later we went through the kids not wanting loft beds any more. My daughter convinced us to dismantle hers so it was just a regular full sized bed on the floor with no room for a desk and a massive clean out of her closet and all her old toys. I photographed all the Barbies, the My Little Ponies, and other oddities (Do we really need a rubber unicorn finger puppet?) and asked my friends if they wanted any of it. My son’s loft bed could not be converted so it was either use a chainsaw or flip the whole thing upside down. We chose the later and ended up having to take it apart and put it back together incorrectly, which was quite the IQ test.

Then it was Easter.

Then my daughter grew out of all her clothes. You know what that means. She wanted new clothes. It seemed like the perfect time to finally get her to watch The True Cost. If you’ve never seen it, you should. And your kids should. It’s about the devastating effect of fast fashion. In actuality bribed her. I said I’d buy her the crap she found on Pinterest if she still wanted them after watching it. She didn’t. We got a few things she needed. I passed her old clothes to friends and got some new-to-us things from other friends.

Quarantine continued and we struggled though online or “distance” learning. Middle School is a MF. I decided it was time to read Queenbees and Wannabees. It is full of great information about the challenges of teenagers. It also re-traumatized me! Ah, adolescence.

And there you have it. That was April.

One of my goals this year is to write more posts. Like many bloggers, I do it for love, not money. It’s a creative outlet. It’s fun and makes me feel connected to others. In many ways it’s like journaling. It helps me see what I’ve accomplished and what I hope to in the future. It helps me to see what’s important and what isn’t and to let go of that.

It’s a funny thing. Such a private, introspective thing that is completely public. Some times I realize I’m shouting into the void, other times I remember that a few people are actually reading it, some people I actually know as well as a bunch of complete strangers. I wonder if I’m being too personal or not personal enough. I ask myself if I’m being too influenced by the blogs I read, not being original or true to myself. I’m probably I’m not alone in this.

So, when I wonder what I should write about I think I want it to be relatable and helpful. The kind of things I talk to my friends about. These days it seems like we’re all talking about surviving. It may look like we’re living the dream on Instagram, but the truth is we’re hanging on by a thread. The biggest challenge seems to be mental stamina. What with it being January in the northeastern part of the US, snow days, flu season, aging parents, unrealized dreams of greatness, the news, holiday weight gain, and all the rest, it’s a lot. And through it all, I am often reminded that many things are luxury problems. The challenge is to not get overwhelmed. Here are some of the ways I cope:

1. Just do the next thing — When I can’t motivate, I just take the next action. It’s best if I do less thinking. I make lists and prioritize those things—does it have to get done today?
2. Try to do some form of exercise most days — I’ll do walking, jogging (often on the treadmill), indoor cycling, yoga, or online workouts.
3. Call women — I learned a long time ago to surround myself with a supportive group of women and it’s not unusual for us to call each other when we’re falling apart or to share good news (or a photo of something we want to buy but really don’t need). When I go too long between calls, or actual face-to-face time, it gets harder and harder to reach out and then I’m in real trouble.
4. Read inspirational books — Right now I’m really enjoying The Year of Living Danishly by Helen Russell. I know “Hygge” is super trendy these days but all about making the most of winter right now. I’m also reading Peace is Every Step by Thich Nhat Hanh as a sort of daily meditation which is amazing.
5. Get out of the house — It’s a bad day when I don’t leave the house once. I work from home so I try to go somewhere else to workout, meet with a client or go have lunch with a friend. Otherwise I’ll have to think up a reason to go out like to get this rug from Target or all the way across town to take a roll of film to be developed only to learn that they mail it out.
6. Do work — Being useful always helps. I am so grateful for all our clients and I love what I do. Being self-employed requires a good amount of self-motivation and it can be hard to get started. My business partner/handsome husband and I started having weekly staff meetings. It’s a good way to get organized and stay motivated—and positive. I wouldn’t describe these meetings as professional… but they do help the morale.
7. Guilty pleasures — Because I’m a stay at home mom and work from home, I have a weird schedule. I often feel guilty that I can workout before work or take off during the work day. But there are things I have to do to maintain my creativity and my sanity. My to-do list includes things like: go to art museum, play the violin, take a nap, put outfits together, buy flowers, take down wallpaper, meditate, paint a painting, make granola, get eyebrows waxed. It may seem trivial or a waste of time to some, but I find it really helps my mental state.

So, I hope you are making it through this time of year and are being good to yourself. How do you stay positive through the winter?